Confessions of a Hedge Witch

Practices for Trying Times

When we hold on to stories about ourselves, ideas or concepts of who we are, we fight hard to maintain them. Maybe we were mocked as children for being nerdy so we clung to our intellect for meaning and identity. Perhaps we struggled in school, so built an identity around our athleticism, humor, beauty or artistic ability.

“It doesn’t matter, I’m creative.”

” I don’t care, at least I’m smarter than….”

“I’m successful, I can take care of myself.”

No matter what identities, concepts and stories were woven to inform who you think you are, it is terrifying to imagine life without them. If you don’t have your intellect…what do you have? If you aren’t the funny one…who are you? If you can’t earn a living for your family, what’s your purpose?

Identities form an armor around us, insulating and protecting us. But armor is rigid. It doesn’t have flex or fluidity. When you depend on your self-generated, or socially constructed, self-concepts and body/self images your ability to respond to dynamic and shifting realities is hampered.

And that brings us to 2020.

We are in the midst of a global pandemic, which impacts both physical and financial security, as well as political stability. What is needed right now, at an individual level, is fluidity, flexibility, and the ability to tolerate high levels of uncertainty.

If you haven’t already done the work to discover, at a visceral level of knowing, that you are NOT your stories about yourself; that you are something other than your self-concepts, it is time to start. Even if you have experienced this state of expansive awareness, it is vitally important in these Trying Times to cultivate the removal of armor (self-concepts, identities, body/self image) to gain fluidity.

Start by sitting comfortably with your back straight. It’s ok to sit in a chair if you need to, or if it’s easier to hold yourself up that way. Take several deep, slow breaths. Become aware of your body, all of your body simultaneously.

Now feel or imagine a white flame blossoming inside both big toes. Imagine this incandescent white flame rising slowly up your feet, ankles, and calves …. as it rises up your body it burns away your self-concepts. It burns away your body image. Burning away your limited sense of self. This white, incandescent flame rises up past your hips, consuming your torso, the belly and the back, rising up your shoulders. Burning away your body image. Burning away concepts of self. As the White, incandescent Flame rises up, consuming your entire body. it reaches to the top of the head and beyond. Your whole body wreathed and enveloped, filled with a beautiful incandescent white fire. Offering into that fire all self images and body images, letting it all burn away.

When the flames die down … leaving behind only pure transparency in the shape of a body. Pure openness. Pure transparency in the shape of a body. Spacious Presence. Then you notice that there is a thin layer of ash on the ground. This ash represents the subconscious, subtle impressions of your self images and body image. Now invite the Wind to blow away these ashes….

Nothing but pure transparency and open spaciousness.

Now imagine a cascade of beautiful brilliant white light pouring down from just above the crown of your head, filling this open space, creating a body of light. A body of brilliant sparkling white light. Within this body of light are subtle radiances of different colors. Beautiful body of light.

Then feel this body of light thicken into form as your physical body. That the physical body is simply the expression in matter of the body of light. Slowly turn the hands palm upwards on the thighs or knees, dropping the chin toward the chest, let your eyes float open and take in your own body as a manifestation of the body of light.